How to Say 'No' without Feeling Guilty and Other Assertiveness Strategies
To be assertive is to be able to state your opinion or express your needs and rights in an outwardly confident manner. Assertive people behave in a way that expresses their confidence and that can command respect.
Assertiveness is sometimes confused with Aggressive or Bullish behaviour but real assertiveness could not be more different. If you are assertive, you stand up for your right to be treated respectfully and fairly by others in a positive and polite way. An assertive person can express their own opinions, needs and feelings without ignoring those of others. Because most people want to be liked and respected, (especially those who lack self-confidence), we often put the needs and desires of others first and avoid expressing our own needs or opinions especially if they conflict with others. However, when we fail to have respect for our own needs, opinions or feelings, others do the same and this can lead to being mistreated or taken for granted by others. Of course, why would others value us if we do not value ourselves?
Assertive people are comfortable with refusing the requests of others if they are inconvenient or too demanding. They are comfortable making requests, sharing opinions, questioning rules or traditions politely, addressing problems and being firm so that their rights are respected and they are able to express how they feel to others.
Many of the clients I meet struggle to be assertive. They fear that if they stand up for themselves or say ‘No’ to an unreasonable request they will offend the other person. Rather than do this, they often say nothing. But saying nothing breeds resentment and often ends relationships. The irony is that this does not have to be a permanent state of affairs - Assertiveness can be learnt.
This transformational course will teach you to understand why you have struggled in the past to assert yourself, and will teach you the techniques and skills you need to become a confident assertive person.
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